Invention Idea #6

My office kitchen fridge has an incredible profusion of soda cans. (As an aside, I don't understand why: If you want it cold, just buy it from the machine right before you drink it. If you brought it from home to save money, you should be buying it in 2L bottles, not cans.)

Many cans are unlabeled, but some have a name scrawled on them, or some tape, or a business card stuck under the tab. However, these solutions have a couple problems. First, they only provide identification, not security. Second, some of these are kind of time-consuming. The tape, for instance, can't take less than 60-90 precious seconds during which you could be reading some hilarious emails forwarded from the secretary.

Thus my invention, which I call "Club Soda". You slip it on, snap it shut and club it with a tiny key. It would be personalized with your name via a tag or engraving or something. Security and identification in under 10 seconds. MSRP $4.99.