Thursday, November 1, 2007


Every single year I think "I'd like to do something different than the usual triangle eyes and so forth" and every single year I fail to find a pumpkin carving kit. This year, Number Two (6 years old) was pretty excited about the idea of weird designs and we escalated awesome ideas up and up to the point that I knew I had to do something.

I had some jigsaw blades lying around. I cut the end off (diagonally, to leave a sharp point) with a wire cutter. Then I sandwiched it between two sticks of wood to make a handle and wrapped it up with duct tape. It works really well. Surprisingly well, actually. There's only two problems, one of which is fixable.

  1. The saw blade isn't long enough. I was able to cut all the way through the pumpkins in most places, but some spots I had to go back over with a knife. A longer blade shouldn't be too hard, though too much longer and it will have to be thicker, which makes fine cuts harder.
  2. Pumpkin shavings are emitted, which collect on the surface, obscuring (or even erasing) the lines drawn there. That said, none of the three of us had any major problems with it. In my case, I just worked in a consistent pattern so that I wasn't dropping goop on places I'd need to see later.
This year's pumpkins were tests of the method and of how well the pumpkin holds up with so much material removed. Here's the result:

OK, this isn't my personal pumpkin--it's a collaboration between Number Two and I. But it shows we tried.

Pumpkin PI, get it? PI (=PIE)??

You don't get it.


  1. I do this every year. Or, I put them outside to "test" them lit, and then leave them out, where they are immediately eaten by bugs and rendered unrecognizable long before the Big Day. This year I am waiting until Oct. 31st at 5 pm. Fresh as a daisy.

  2. You know - it's scientific studies such as these that really make the Internet the exciting place it is.

  3. Now that the Lunch Matrix is taken, what else is left?

    Do you have a blogonet? I like to keep tabs on my stalkers.

  4. Well sir, I don't know what a blogonet is but if it can be downloaded via bittorrent I probably have a friend who has it. I'll call around and get back to you.

  5. Oh OH!

    I do have a mostly defunct blog which can be found here:

    Frankly I just don't have the energy to connect more than a few thoughts in a row these days, let alone share them with the unwashed masses.

  6. Don't worry if you don't update it. I can feed your existing blogoweb corpus into the Top Super Secret Ultra Hush Hush parser here at work and pinpoint your exact location. As well as the locations of your colleagues.

    Ever vigilantly yours

  7. HA!

    That works both ways I'll have you know. In fact I just got a hit on my mostly defunct blog from someone at a Starbucks near the I75 exit ramp in the smelly state of MA. It's now just a matter or triangulating that address with the local satellites then subtracting the difference between the speed of light and the drag coefficient of gravity and I'll have the GPS coordinates of your parking spot at work.

    Warmest regards,

  8. Okay okay, Pumpkin PI is right clever. Damn clever in fact.